You Are Not Alone

We are here in your times of need. Grief is a multifaceted response to loss, particularly to the loss of someone or something to which a bond was formed. Although conventionally focused on the emotional response to loss, it also has physical, cognitive, behavioral, social, spiritual, and philosophical dimensions. While the terms are often used interchangeably, bereavement refers to the state of loss, and grief is the reaction to loss.

John 14:1-4 “Do not let your hearts be troubled. You believe in God; believe also in me. My Father’s house has many rooms; if that were not so, would I have told you that I am going there to prepare a place for you? And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am. You know the way to the place where I am going.”

Revelation 21:4 “ ‘He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death’ or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.”

Psalm 119:50 “My comfort in my suffering is this: Your promise preserves my life.”

What is grief?

Grief (noun): narrowly defined as a keen intense form of distress, sorrow, bereavement and despair usually brought about by a sudden or not too sudden unfortunate chain of natural events. This is usually brought on by instances of loss -- typically a loss of loved ones.

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In this section

Grief and Healing

Grief Resources

Typically in the grieving process we encounter five stages:

1) Denial and Isolation- This carries us through the first wave of shock. This is where we refuse to accept the reality of the situation before us;

2) Anger- The anger may be aimed at inanimate objects, complete strangers, friends or family. Anger may be directed at our dying or deceased loved one. Rationally, we know the person is not to be blamed. Emotionally, however, we may resent the person for causing us pain or for leaving us. We feel guilty for being angry, and this makes us more angry;

3) Bargaining- The normal reaction to feelings of helplessness and vulnerability is often a need to regain control;

If only we had sought medical attention sooner…

If only we got a second opinion from another doctor…

If only we had tried to be a better person toward them…

Secretly, we may make a deal with God or our higher power in an attempt to postpone the inevitable. This is a weaker line of defense to protect us from the painful reality;

4) Depression- Two types of depression are associated with mourning.

The first one is a reaction to practical implications relating to the loss. Sadness and regret predominate this type of depression. We worry about the costs and burial. We worry that, in our grief, we have spent less time with others who depend on us. This phase may be eased by simple clarification and reassurance. We may need a bit of helpful cooperation and a few kind words.

The second type of depression is more subtle and, in a sense, perhaps more private. It is our quiet preparation to separate and to bid our loved one farewell. Sometimes all we really need is a hug;

5) Acceptance- Reaching this stage of mourning is a gift not afforded to everyone. Death may be sudden and unexpected or we may never see beyond our anger or denial. It is not necessarily a mark of bravery to resist the inevitable and to deny ourselves the opportunity to make our peace. This phase is marked by withdrawal and calm. This is not a period of happiness and must be distinguished from depression

Grief counseling

Please in times of tragedy reach out to our dedicated staff of professionals, clergy and laymen to help and assist you during these turbulent times. We are here for you.

The grieving process

A myth about grief is that it’ll destroy us. People tend to bounce back after loss much faster than we previously thought. What’s effective really depends on what feels right to you. Identifying your thoughts and feelings, expressing them in some way and perhaps sharing the process with someone you trust can be helpful.

People also can benefit from considering how they’ve grappled with tough times in the past. If you’re struggling with anxiety, what has helped you before? You may turn to new tools, such as meditation, physical activity or deep breathing. Counseling can help, as well.

The more effective treatments have focused on getting people back into their life and moving forward,” he added.

All experts recommend reaching out to loved ones and getting support. Some people may feel isolated and believe others don’t understand what they’re going through So support groups may also be helpful.

Helping yourself heal

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